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31. Vegetable Granola
To Westerners, finding a box (or even a ziplock bag) of cereal in Japan is equivalent to winning the lottery, celebrating the birth of a first child, or paying off that third mortgage. But the joy...
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32. Melon Crunky
Melon Crunky is an interesting study in etymology. Who named this dereliction, and what self-destructive outcome did he or she have in mind? Such a name could only be derived from the following word...
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33. Dog Pocky
The astute reader will immediately notice something wrong with this picture. While the juxtaposition of these two boxes seems like little to meet the eye, a closer, more incisive view, reveals the...
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34. Ice Cream Ramen
What you are seeing here is not a mirage. These are actually two full-fledged ice cream cones dumped in a sewer of pork clippings and noodle detritus. Only two egg halves swell from the shadows of the...
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35. Packet Pasta
This is not a feminine hygiene product. This is an individually-wrapped single serving of pasta. We can only guess that this product was designed with the bachelor in mind. Were it never invented,...
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36. The Bifurcated Octopus
In addition to buying vending machine takoyaki, you can now buy a fully bifurcated octopus for roughly $20 US. The benefits of purchasing a mid-sagittal plane cut of octopus are myriad: this option...
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37. The Convenience Store Hamburger
“HYOGO — Police on Tuesday said that a 19-year-old man was taken to hospital on Sunday night after he swallowed a 1-cm fish hook inside a hamburger that his mother bought for him at a FamilyMart...
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38. The Marshmallow Parfait
This is just one example of how the Japanese gourmandize ball-park favourites and convert them into something slightly more honourable than Big League Chew. Yet, this particular recipe is rather...
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39. The Miso Soup Bomb
We’ve already discussed how some treasures in life cannot be captured. But this is a new level of debauchery. Miso Soup, one of Japan’s greatest culinary merits, is now reduced to a conglomeration of...
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40. Octopus Ice Cream
It is on this melancholic note that Culinary Abortions from Japan must come to a sudden, dire end. Readers will be saddened, or perhaps relieved, but they will not be surprised–for there is no greater...
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